It's Been....

3 1/2 weeks since I started working and I have yet to see the likes of a business card.  I normally wouldn't care, but it seems as though everyone here is business card happy.  Say you go to a -security cleared- dining and libating establishment where the expat crowd convenes to exchange interesting stories about their experiences.  Say you strike a conversation with someone that knows someone that you are there with.  Guaranteed they will ask what you do and request a business card within the first 2.5 seconds of the conversation (Note: time not arbitrary; 2 seconds is spent exchanging pleasantries and aliases and .5 seconds is spent on the handshake that may or may not size you up for the rest of your existence in Afghanistan).

So you can imagine the inconvenience of having to explain that you don't yet have a business card (and its yet to be designed) and pulling out a pen and paper to write down your contact information.  Like I said, normally I wouldn't really care, but here it feels like I'm committing a crime.  And somebody answer me this: why, of all the office materials that one can have, do I have a glue stick (!) before a business card?

Maybe they're trying to hint that I should make my own? (insert squinted eyes here) And the glue is there to help me paste the 2 sides together!  

Reality

Whoaaaa Nelly

I had the pleasure of going to a Buzkhashi match at General Fahim's personal Buzkhashi grounds.  We were so close to the action that we had to fend off dirt and shit.  We could even reach out and touch someone, i.e., a horse.  What a crazy game and the whole time I kept thinking about how the Afghans want this to be an Olympic sport.  Who the fuck would play against this mob?  I was blown away though because these guys reach over and under their horses to grab a calf's body that has been soaked in water for 24 hours.  So it's double it's normal weight.  And after they grab the sucker, they ride with the dangling carcass across the field, around a pole and again in order to drop it into a chalk-outlined circle.  All this while everyone else that doesn't have the carcass is trying to bombard you and smack you into submission.  Everyone has these leather sticks that they use to smack their opponent in the head with or even their horse.

Obvi's the horse above is thinking "Fuck this shit!"  I wish the internet connection here was fast enough so that I could post for you the video of this joyous game.  So while these guys beat each other and their horses while fighting over the carcass of an innocent calf, General Fahim and his esteemed colleagues place bets on the riders.  It's every man for himself here.  Although the guys in red are all Fahim's players and guess what?  They won almost every time!  These guys make in one game what most Afghans wish they made in a whole month.  I wonder how much Fahim and his mates made!  Anyhorsey, I'm glad I went, and I don't see myself going again unless by some freakish decision lulee came for a visit and then I would have to make her dreams come true and take her.

This one's for you lulee.

Weekends a la Kabul

Now that I'm a working girl (not that kind of working girl, you dirty minded fools), I don't get to see the sun much because I spend about 10 hours a day at my desk.  I work to the soundtrack of

"click click click click click click click click click click click click clickclick click click click click click click click click click clickclick click click click click click click click click click click click click click"

and

salamalaykomjanojoonbekhair?khoobhasteem?mahkhoobee?assayarazangmeezzanamkhoobhasteen?blahblahblahblahblahblahblah"

It's enough to make me want to lose my mind, but it makes me look forward to the weekends that much more.  Weekends in Kabul are interesting because it's not like you can be all last minute about things.  You have to plan ahead and if you don't, you're stuck.  So this past weekend was Nawruz and D's bro was ending a horrible week of vacation here, so we decided to spend as much time cradling his broken heart as possible.  Friday morning started with a trip to Qargah Lake, where we witnessed a super awesome dance-off between modern and traditional Pashtun boys (will post video soon), went to a BBQ at my favorite (not) Frenchie's house in the afternoon and then on to way too many alcoholic beverages in the evening.  Got stopped by the police at a check point because I had my chador covering my whole face and got harassed for a 5 minutes.

****Insert side note here**** One would think that being fully covered here would be a good thing, but I honestly get harassed no matter what.  Fully covered, no ankles showing, I get spat at.  Not fully covered, ankles showing, I get spat at.  Chador covering my face a la burqa style, I get harassed.  I can't win!

Anyhow, the next few days I spent walking around, which is a novelty here, playing tennis, trying to feed a pregnant cat some funky looking chicken that arrived on my plate (you know there's something wrong when even the preggo cat won't eat it) and getting more drunk.  All in all a good weekend compared to most.  Now I'm halfway through another work week and waiting for the next few days to pass.

Enyoy!!

Why

does the hot water get hotter, scalding even (!), when I turn on the cold water to balance it out?  Isn't the rule hot+cold=warm showering goodness?  Not here.  I think that if properly warm water was available for showering to more people here, there just might not be as much war or suicide bombs.  Seriously.

I know this is my first post in a long time and it might seem arbitrary to all of you with nice warm showers out there, but did you ever consider that I couldn't move my fingers to type because of all the caked on dirt because I couldn't shower for days? Huh? Did you?